Ramona

Still haven't finished reading "Ramona", a novel set in the late 19th century Southern California by Helena Hunt Jackson. It revolves around the tragic love affair between a half-Indian adopted by an elite family and a talented Indian in an era when Indians were oppressed and discriminated against.

It is notable that in this novel, priests are regarded as benevolent missionaries who protect the Indians. In fact the antagonists in the novel, though not really the main focus of the story, are the white Americans (because the term "American" disputedly refers to America's original inhabitants, the Native Indians... And I share the same thought) whose landgrabbing activities and propensity for disturbing peace in the land cause the natives to flee and be slaves in their own ancestral lands. This, by the way, is an issue that the Philippines has also been facing as news reports of lumad (indigenous people) killings are increasing again.

Aside from providing a picture of the plight of the natives, Jackson also offers insights on the inner workings of human minds. Much of the narrative presents the different points of view of the characters but more so of the Señora Moreno, a complex character with whom anyone can easily hate and sympathize with at the same time.

On this note, I want to quote parts of the book:

"There is nothing so skillfull in its own defenses as imperious pride. It has an ingenious system of its own, of reprisals, --- a system so ingenious that the defeat must be sore indeed, after which it cannot still find some booty to bring off! And even greater than this ingenuity at reprisals is its capacity for self-deception. In this regard, it outdoes vanity a thousandfold. Wounded vanity knows when it is mortally hurt; and limps off the field, piteous, all disguises thrown away. But pride carries its banner to the last; and fast as it is driven from one field unfurls it in another, never admitting that there is a shade less honora in the second field than in the first, or in the third than in the second; and so on till death. It is impossible not to have a certain sort of admiration for this kind of pride. Cruel, those who have it, are to all who come in their way; but they are equally cruel to themselves, when pride demands the sacrifice. Such pride as this had led many a forlorn hope, on the earth, when all other motives have died out of men's breasts; has won many a crown, which has not been called by its true name." (p. 150)

 The context: the Señora found out that Ramona, her adopted child, wss having an affair with Alessandro the Indian. For this, she kept herself busy devising ways on how to separate the two.

"But surfaces are deceitful, and eyes see little. Considering its complexity, the fineness and delicacy of its mechanism, the results attainable by the human eye seem far from adequate to the expenditure put upon it. We have flattered ourselves by inventing proverbs of comparison in matter of blindness, ---'blind as a bat' for instance. It would be safe to say that there cannot be found in the animal kingdom a bat, or any other creature,so blind in its range of circumstances and connections, as thegreater majority of human beings are in the bosoms of their families. Tempers strain and recover, hearts break and heal, strength falters, fails, and comes near to giving way altogether, everyday, without being noted by the closest lookers-on."

The context: the peace in the Moreno household was disrupted by the "scandalous" love affair and a maid named Margarita observes with great interest as to what is happening about, being Alessandro's jilted lover, but is surprised when Ramona, Señora Moreno, and her son Felipe all acted as if nothing happened as they went about their usual ways, dining together.

Personally, the last sentence struck a chord. I think of the Light again, how oblivious I was that she was in pain, that she was keeping something from us, maintaining a brave front and continuing to work as if all that work were nothing. It was only later on, early this year, when she started to complain about her legs aching. Being reminded of those moments make me feel guilty Because in the end, I could do nothing for her. And she has always been my biggest cheerleader and supporter, the one person who never tired of me.

So now in everything I do, I will do my best. When my strength falters, I will remember her pushing me, always telling me to reach my fullest potential, to strive for excellence and achieve my dreams. I just want to make her proud now as she watches over us from Heaven.