Thursday, September 27, 2012

The Phantom of the Opera

Catchy songs, beautiful lyrics, fabulous costume, detailed props, wonderful actors and musicians... all these make up one grand performance. And one grand performance The Phantom of the Opera was.

Last Thursday was the first time in many years that I went to CCP with my dad. I was also accompanied by a friend and her friends. Despite being a bit unwell following my very slow recuperation from fever last week, I was still adamant and told myself that I WILL CERTAINLY NOT MISS The Phantom of the Opera for anything.

Such was my decision, especially after watching the 25th anniversary of the musical as performed in the Royal Albert Hall. After that I understood completely why the name of Andrew Lloyd Webber is famed. He is a musical genius!!!

Watching the musical live at CCP was surreal. I never was bored, not a minute of boredom. For some reason, watching it live was more engaging. For instance, I still can't get over the slight change in the script when the previous manager of Opera Populaire says he will be off to Boracay for his vacation. that surely elicited laughter from an appreciating audience.

Jonathan Roxmouth, who played the role of the Phantom, was brilliant. Without doubt he gave justice to the character he is portraying as one can very easily feel the Phantom's frustrations and anger. Also well-loved is Andrea Creighton who played the role of Carlotta. It's just so hard to hate this character who is both funny and a really really good singer. Also a fave is Cat Lane who played a minor role, that of Meg Giry. For some reason, I find this girl charming and lovable.

I have had the wonderful opportunity to ask questions to an usher during the intermission since we sat two rows from the stage. According to him, all the props, including the "statues" framing the stage and the beautiful curtains, are all owned by the production. Wow! All that effort! At that time, I understood what I really paid for and at the end of the performance, thought to myself that everything is so worth it. In fact, I was thinking of watching it all over again. Now if only I have the money, I'd certainly go back and relieve the experience. It was just so fantastic.

Also, because I was so impressed by the orchestra who beautifully played the music, I asked a bit about the group. The usher told me that included in the orchestra are some members of the Philippine Philharmonic Orchestra (PPO). Wow! Right then and there, I vowed to myself to really really support our local musicians and also to get exposed to local plays. (I frequent Dulaang UP's plays since UP is accessible.)

A Message 4

"To love someone deeply gives you strength. Being loved by someone deeply gives you courage."

I have been meditating on these words ever since I received this quote from Mr. Ube as I attempt to give a value to these two propositions. All this while marveling at how timely this quote came as I constantly found myself praying for courage and strength.

Saturday, September 22, 2012

From Multiply 015: Blue JAY


Oh Blue JAY, Blue JAY, wherefore art thou Blue JAY?

The moon was the sole witness to a sad affair
Shared by the princess and the Blue JAY
On that night when the small bird
Invaded the dream of the princess in lone woods.
In her dreams, her prince was in her room
Upon waking up, just the Blue JAY
And the sunlight streaming inside
Greeted her eyes brimming with tears.
She looked out into the window
And stares at the blue sky
The Blue JAY on her shoulder sang a song
A sad lullaby of farewells.
And he flapped his wings
Out into the big sky he flew
With a string of tears for the princess
The princess he never knew.
The princess recalled that fateful day
Of meeting the real Blue JAY
Sad, shy and oh so sorrowful
But a snob nevertheless.
“Blue JAY, Blue JAY, where are you?”
The princess called out to the world
But a scorn she received
For the Blue JAY hid himself.
Why does the Blue JAY appear
Still in her dreams fragile and sad?
Is it thus to torment her
Until the end of her days?

And so on this night
When all is yet all is not
Shall you invade the silence
Or shall you appear in reality?

Blue JAY, Blue JAY,
I call out to you.
Make the princess suffer no more.
Sing to her the love of yore.
Lend her your wings of love
And fly her to the skies above.

An echo shall ensue
To the ends of the world
To the infinity of time
“Blue JAAY, Blue JAAY!”



Oct 29, '08 7:15 AM
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From Multiply 014: Why EL?


To all the people who ask me why I took EL instead of courses requiring Math and Science skills, here is my late response to you.

It doesn’t only take root from my love of languages. It’s more like an addiction to knowledge and my twisted idea of being as unique as I can in this boring world.

Bacon once said that the conquest of learning can be achieved through languages. I find this very true, being someone who’s not satisfied with the limited amount of books translated into English. At least if I get to master a lot of languages, I can delve deeper into different subjects especially those which are controversial like for example, the Bible. I’ve long been wanting with all my heart to read the original Bible, the scrolls themselves in Aramaic, Hebrew and Greek. As a human being who believes in the existence of a Supreme Being, I have the right to know and to scrutinize my faith, starting from the tangible resources which are available in the world, i.e. the authentic texts.

Right now, as I have learned a little Latin (a dead language which drags a lot of people to death…just kidding) I feel like continuing it on my own if my school won’t offer higher Latin courses. (Thanks to Umberto Eco for motivating me to learn that dead language, thanks also to my childhood fascination with mythology, in this case, Roman mythology, I didn’t feel forced at all to attend classes coz I have a goal after Latin 10--- to read Pliny’s accounts and Vergil’s Aenid in Latin. That is, if I find the means and the time.) Latin, I believe, shall be a great help once I find books on the Christian doctrine written in Latin. (I’d also like to read St. Jerome’s Vulgate Bible.)

There, I’ve answered the question with my primary reason, that is, because of my insatiable thirst for knowledge.

Second, I wanted to take up something different in college. I wanted my college life to be livelier. (But it’s still hellish not having enough time to read novels, watch anime and going on gimmicks because of my duty in the office, darn it! I’m living such a dull life!) So instead of pursuing Mathematics or Physics or Microbiology, (I hate Bio but I know microbiologists make oodles of money hahaha!!!) I ended up choosing EL before the UPCAT. I got the result of the entrance exam after finishing one year’s study of EL (and GE subjects) and I felt like I did the right choice because my grades are as follows:

Language Proficiency- 99
Reading Comprehension- 98
Math- 98
Science- 95

And I didn’t have one bit of regret because I can proudly say that I’m multilingual now. (I speak Filipino, English, Chinese (Fookien and Mandarin), Japanese (no formal training so don’t expect much, please), Spanish and French.) I mean, if I go to any country, I have the means to survive. (I’d like to learn Swahili next haha. Just to mingle with Africans but I’m still looking for a way to do it…)

I don’t know if people really are impressed when they learn I’m an EL student but here are the usual reactions:

1.    “Wow, e di magaling ka magSpanish?”
2.    “Sige nga magSpanish ka nga.”
(When I ask them what they want me to say, they’d reply “anything” which is kinda difficult so they’d ask me to translate “I am beautiful”, Beieve it or not, 99% asked me to translate that sentence!!! And I’d say “Yo soy fea” hahaha!!! BAHALA SILA!!!)
3.    “That’s interesting!!!”
4.    “Wow, e di pupunta ka sa Europe na?”
(You bet I am, that is, if I have a scholarship. I want to continue my studies there. And when I’m there, ligaré con los chorvos HAHAHA!!!)

Third, a minor reason actually, is so I can go around the world without the need of interpreters. And people will marvel at me for being able to speak Chinese, too, which BTW, is considered as one of the most difficult languages in the world. I guess, I’d feel a sense of pride, too.

But the biggest reason why I chose EL and never shifted to other courses is because I’m enjoying the discovery of grammar rules, how I can connect words from one language to the other, etc.

And I want to make something crystal clear. I’m an EL student but it doesn’t mean that I don’t like the Filipino language. People may think that EL students are kinda elitists because they prefer Euro languages over Filipino. The Chinese are known to be ethnocentric thus they look down on the Filipino language. But it’s the language I grew up with (er, together with Chinese and English books) and the language I can use in my daily life especially here in my own country.

Kinda ironic coz I write in English. But if you know me, I rarely speak English, Filipino still is my preferred language in conversations.


Sep 27, '08 11:50 PM
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From Multiply 013: The Rouge on Your Lips


Let me taste the rouge on your lips…

             I am as pale as the moonlight on a foggy night,
            The blood beneath my skin rushes out
            To free itself from this body of desire,
            As the needles of memory pierce my skin.

            Your words are forged out of the sharpest steel
            And you care not to whom you hurl those daggers
            You have flung the sharpest right into my heart
            And there it stayed until this very minute.


Let me taste the rouge on your lips…

            I am as cold as the permafrost
            I need the warmth from the blue flames of sadness
            Let my thoughts be sent directly to your heart,
            That you may know how you make me suffer.


Let me taste the rouge on your lips…

            I am immobile as a marionette,
            Only for a taste of your lips do I endure this agony.
            But fain would I bow down to Death’s scythe,
            If not a touch of your hand I feel this instant.


Let me taste the rouge on your lips…

            My blood scatters around me
            Like red petals against the backdrop of snow
            Ah… the pain and the sadness and the torture…
            They all make me want to taste the rouge on your lips.


Apr 20, '08 2:01 AM
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From Multiply 012: The Rain


I wake up to the sound of the rain,
Pounding furiously on cemented ground.
The infinite crystal needles from Heaven
Fall down upon the vulnerable hearts.

The sound of the rain is music to my ears,
Yet why does it make me want to cry?
For some particular reason,
I want to be one with the rain.

If Heaven is an idyllic paradise,
Why does it cry every now and then?
Or maybe it hurls the unwanted passions
To the world already inhabited by sorrow.

I have forgotten how it feels like
To be totally drenched in the rain.
My umbrella has shielded me from painful showers
How my body longs to be weakened now!

Ah, rainy days paint a melancholy scene
How beautiful nature works her piece!
My chest is being suffocated from the sad beauty
To the point of breaking into a million pieces.

Perhaps it would be nice to be together
Out there in the open, being drenched in the rain.
I would like to tell you a lot of things
While Heaven unleashes her passions.

Perhaps we could be together
After that moment in the rain.
Yet that moment is just a dream I weave
As I lie among the emerald serpents.

Everything is the rain’s fault!
The painful longing inside my heart
Intensifies to the point of breaking me,
But why do I love the rain?

Apr 20, '08 2:00 AM
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From Multiply 011: A Prayer for a Change


"Prayer is an ineffable act. It does not claim to be anything, but it can do everything."
Paul Sedir
Martinist Order and Synarchy

Why do I pray? Having come from a non-sectarian high school where most of my classmates are atheists, I was often confronted by this question. I would always answer nonchalantly that the reason is because it helps me a lot. Otherwise, I wouldn't bother to pray.

Many people get this impression that a person prays only when in dire need of divine assistance. If a man is beset with a series of unfortunate events, the one thing he's sure to do is to pray to God for a miracle that would straighten out his life. For me, however, praying is more than asking God to lift you up when you're in deep water. For me, praying makes me learn things I don't get to learn within the four corners of a classroom.

So, why do I pray?

I pray because it's the only thing I can do aside from watching the sceneries while onboard the jeepney. Gazing out at the healthy leaves of trees glistening in the sunlight on sunny days, the slowly floating puffy fluffy clouds on cloudy days, the soft downpour from the heavens on rainy days and other seemingly common scenes make me admire nature more. I can't help but be awed at God's wonderful creations, and I just have to send a prayer of gratitude. I learn to appreciate the small things in life.

I pray because I care for others, most especially, the streetchildren who have to struggle for survival when they should be in school, mapping out their future. More often than not, they are ignored and at times, considered as non-existent in the eyes of passersby. When I have spare change, I give some to them so they can buy food. The least I can do is pray to God and ask Him to somehow alleviate their poor condition. i learn to be more compassionate especially with the poor.

I pray because it drives away the loneliness in me. When I pray, I not only get to talk to God, i also get to know myself more as i contemplate on the things I have prayed for.

I pray because praying gives me a sense of comfort and assurance that I should not fear. The phrase " Do not be afraid" appears 365 times in the Bible, giving enough assurance to anyone who seeks God that everyday in our life, we can be alright because he is always there for us. I learn to trust and believe.

I pray because it offers me a new kind of strength that would make me steadfast in my beliefs even though people may criticize me for believing in the "unprovable". I learn to be strong in the midst of temptations to deny my faith.

I pray because I want God to shepherd me to the right path, so that I may be able to acquire "a pair of hind's feet" to climb up the steep "high places" like in the Book of Habakkuk. Free will can, at times, cause one to take pride in himself and sin against God. I learn to be humble and to submit to God's will.

I pray because it motivates me to do good things for others. As I praise and glorify God in my prayers, I realize I must do something for God's glory. I learn to live an upright life for God.

 Like any other humans, I also pray for divine assistance, especially after doing everything I could, and yet things don't turn out the way I expect it to be. Humans are desperate, thus, they turn to god for a surefire way to make things better. It's not always that we can do everything on our own. Hardwork, coupled with faith in God, can spell a big difference. I learn to accept my limitations as a mere human being who is incapable of doing everything without the help of the Divine. I also learn to acknowledge God as the only perfect being in the universe.

I have left out, however, the most important reason why I pray. To bring about change in this materialistic, corrupted, and perverse world of ours.

Everyone prays for a "perfect world" -one devoid of sin and vice, a world where war, famine, poverty, strife and discrimination are non-existent. But not everyone does his share to make this a dream come true. In order to bring about change on a large scale, change must first occur within an individual. I believe that if everyone changes for the better, surely, the world will also change for the better.

Comparing myself from the past to the present me, I have certainly changed a lot. From being a self-centered, insolent fool that I was who used to dwell in dark cocoons, I have broken free of my prison and emerged as a butterfly which bathes in the beauty of sunlight.

I have undergone changes within myself. Still, I do not consider myself perfect, because nobody really is perfect. It is a cliché to state that, but it is the truth. I still commit sins, consciously or not. But I find it in my heart the will to change and I stick to the belief that prayers would really help me gradually change into a better person. And I hope it would be the same for everyone, too.



Feb 20, '08 5:28 AM
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Science Books

Lately I have noticed that my book purchases are related to the sciences. Ever since I became interested in chaos and also in cognitive psychology (the latter thanks to Colin Renfrew whose archaeological theories I truly admire despite obvious minor flaws), I suddenly have this thirst for the sciences.

Just yesterday, I intentionally passed by Booksale to see if I can find something to but since it's been weeks since my last book purchase.

I was delighted to find Volume 42 of Great Books which contains Antoine Laurent Lavoisier's Elements of Chemistry and Michael Faraday's Experimental Researches in Electricity. I also bought an introductory textbook on cognitive psychology entitled Cognitive Science: An Introduction to the Study of Mind by Jay Friedenberg andd Gordon Silverman, as well as Arnoldo Has and Dean Wilde's The Delta Project: Discovering New Sources of Profitability in a Networked Economy.

Years back, I wouldn't have even given these types of books a second look when at a bookstore. It just surprises me how tastes can also change through the years.

U.S., Israel, and the Muslims

The past few days saw news of protests against an anti-Islam video which depicted Prophet Muhammad in a negative light, thus enraging the Arab and Muslim world. (See here, here, or simply do a quick research on the internet and you will find many related news articles.)

Reading about the violent protests and also about the burning of US and Israeli flags made me have a glimpse of what could have happened and what could happen.

Just what is the purpose of those behind the video?

Maybe it is something to incite the Muslims to do something that will spark a war involving the US and Israel. The US economy has been on the decline and the devil needs to sow discord to keep its position as a major global power. The devil would want the Muslims to react violently to a seemingly non-dangerous thing, and knowing how much the Muslims revere their Prophet and how passionate they are with regards to Islam, the said religion would then be the perfect target to denigrate so as to incite the Muslims into violent actions. All this, for a war to be born.

Still, I have faith in Muslims. Stupid people would readily judge Muslims as terrorists. But we are supposed to be living in an enlightened age where each respects the other's beliefs. I commend Bangkok's Muslims for their peaceful protests (see here).

Have we not learned from history, in particular, from the Crusades and the Inquisition? Have we not learned that intolerance brings nothing but misery? How could the Jewish people team up with the devil (U.S) and now practice intolerance when Jewish history is characterized by too much suffering from Christians who denounced them and regarded them as lower than pigs? How could the Jews, whom I hold in high regard and respect, act foolishly in these times when we are supposed to be working together for peace among nations?

Saturday, September 15, 2012

From Multiply 010: Méli-mélo 007


By nature fair as the moon,
With talents to match a fairy,
Yet so eccentric that all marvel at her.
To her, men are filthy;
Rich men in silk are vulgar and loathsome.
She knows not that superiority fosters hatred,
For the world envies too much talents.
By the purple sky of the setting sun,
She will fade away,
Like a rainbow-colored bubble.
Her rouge and handkerchief,
Her youth and beauty, all wasted
For a man she both despises and loves.
Even as a crystal rose dropped in thick mud,
Young scions of noble houses will sigh for her.


Jan 2, '08 5:16 PM
for Miracle's friends and Miracle's family

From Multiply 009: Méli-mélo 006


She is in a cradle left in swift waters,
And living in hard times, who will dote on her?
With luck, she is born too courageous and open-hearted,
Ever to take a love affair to heart.
Like bright moon and gentle zephyrs in the Phoenix Shrine,
Fate matches her with a handsome husband.
May she live with him for long years,
To make up for her wretched childhood!
But overhead the clouds disperse,
The river of honey runs dry.
This is the common fate of vulnerable men,
Useless it may be to resist.

Jan 2, '08 5:15 PM
for Miracle's friends and Miracle's family

From Multiply 008: Méli-mélo 005


Thousand of miles she must sail through hail and storm,
Giving up herself and everything she has,
But afraid to distress her own declining years.
She tells herself: “Do not shed tears,
Everything has been fated aeons ago                 .
People meet and then they bid farewell.
From now on, I shall live alone.
Let me live in peace.
Do not worry over the course of events.”

Jan 2, '08 5:14 PM
for Miracle's friends, Miracle's family and Miracle's online buddies

From Multiply 007: Méli-mélo 004


At the height of passion and desire,
Gloom comes for her.
With eyes closed, she succumbs to its every wish.
As her lively soul begins to wane,
So far her own beyond the distant memories,
That in a dream, she finds and tells her lover,
“The new moon has gone into hiding;
You must find someone other than me.”

Jan 2, '08 5:14 PM
for Miracle's friends and Miracle's family

From Multiply 006: Unsent Letters 001


To the Prince of the Jade Moon Hall,

             Many times I wonder what would have been if we were not caught in the unruly web of fate. What if I had not met you near the Arcade Chamber where the first seeds of hatred were sowed in my heart? The weather was fine, the sky was blue and yet, nature failed to make a sweet girl out of me. Or perhaps it must be because of the many disappointments in life that caused me to look at you with cold and indifferent eyes. And you were with your close friend, the Jack of the August Autumn Yard, who never spoke a word during our first encounter. Really, I found the two of you a quite contrasting pair… well, I admit, still up to now, I do so.

            We used to meet twice a week. The three of us used to be the first ones to be in the Arcade Chamber. It made me feel rather uncomfortable with just the three of us for I did not know what to do. Should I approach the two of you or should I just pretend that you did not exist? It was a hard decision and I chose the latter because I was a coward as well. I simply hate to associate myself with men for I think they are despicable creatures who do not deserve a place in the world. (Sorry for my frankness, but since this is an “unsent” letter, I might as well voice put my true feelings and opinions…)

            One day, my wish came, and rather unexpectedly. One of your companions, the Master of Opaque Kites, was the first one among the three of you, who made a bold front of asking me questions which really made me lift my right eyebrow in contempt. But I admire his audacity because he did that despite my seemingly uninterested and cold attitude. And thus, he was my first crush for that period of time.

            But my heart must be playing tricks with me. The Master was my crush and yet, why do the thought of you linger in my head? Much as I’d hate to admit it, I began to feel that perhaps you are my crush. After several days, you really became my official crush. And it was not easy for me, to see you in different places, to have us look at each other for a long time without even a “hi” nor “hello” nor a wave nor a gesture of sorts. It pained me not to be able to get close to you like some girls could. Maybe we were not meant for each other. Maybe this is just another case of unrequited love, another love story destined to fall into the trash bin.

             When I finally picked up the courage and made up my mind to forget about you and to end the fantasy follies, you started to invade my dreams. Yes, you and your friend, the Jack. The worst part is that they were telling me that you do not care one bit about me. The confusing thing is that they were telling me that someone is trying hard to get my attention but find it hard to do so. And he’s none other than the Jack.

             I want to talk to you even for just a moment. I just want to clear things up between us because I can’t go any further without the answers I want. I want to move forward, sure of myself and without regrets, because the future is so uncertain and sometimes, the vastness of the universe scares me. Grant me this one humble wish. I also have a lot to say. I also want to apologize to you up front for being a snob. I want to get to know more about you, so that in doing so, I might be able to understand you. Or we can be friends. Anything, to help erase the feelings I have for you.

            I am currently on a standstill. The pressures of life are choking my heart. But still, let destiny take over and let fate entwine my path with that of the one I have been looking for.

        

With a thorny heart,

The Maiden of Silent Chamber


Jan 2, '08 5:12 PM
for Miracle's friends & their friends and Miracle's family & their family

From Multiply 005: Méli-mélo 003

One is a smiling silence from fairy land,
The other, a well-polished gold.
And were it not by fate,
Why should they meet after eighteen summers?
And if fated,
Why do their hands not clasp each other?
One sighs with deep longing,
The other tries in vain;
One is the moon reflected in the water,
The other, but a wreath of flowers in the mirror.
How many tears can flow from down her cheeks?
Can they flood her life all year round?

Dec 28, '07 6:04 AM
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From Multiply 004: Méli-mélo 002

Well-matched, none says, the sun and the moon.
Only I recall the silent stares between gold and silver,
Vainly facing the back of people under a clear blue sky
I forget not the fairy in lone woods beyond the world
I weep, learning that no man is made with a heart whole
Even a couple who share a single heart
May break in two.

Dec 28, '07 5:59 AM
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From Multiply 003: Méli-mélo 001

At the dawn of creation,
Who sowed the seeds of sorrow?
From the strong passions of the wind and darkness they came
So in this world of sad festivities
On a day of bliss, in a moment of pleasure,
Fain would I share my profound rapture
By chanting this dream of the obsidian butterfly,
To unite the sun and the moon.



Dec 28, '07 5:58 AM
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From Multiply 002: Bloody Butterfly

Everywhere is an invisible mirror
I can see you clearly from here
I can see how you flutter your wings
How you dance from one flower to another.

How I’d love to touch your rainbow body
A gift from Heaven when others were asleep
You, who shine like a prism diamond,
Is the sole delight of my hungry eyes.

One day, I pray I’d get my wish
The stars conspire with the moon, the moon with the sun
And the rosy dawn urges you to come near me
Ah, you dance in front of me like an innocent fairy!

You perform for me your lovely steps of seduction
I look at you, enchanted by a goddess
The day wears on and the Purple Princess takes her reign
You change your color to a bright shade of crimson.

Every step is pain, every flutter is sorrow
The dance you perform is the dance of death
Suited to one who torments the feelings of others,
Yet offered to one who weeps in agony over a broken heart.

I watch you transform into a lonely maiden
Blood is your garment and steely eyes your weapon
A cold apparition knowing neither joy nor pain
The invisible barrier goes between us.

No matter how hard I try to break the mirror
It does not move, the silent witness of self-destruction!
You approach me and we pretend to hold each other
The pain of not being able to embrace!

Tears touch the wall but the wall coldly ignores
Your blood is flowing freely but you don’t mind
My voice is silently shouting and you look at me
With that beautiful unfeeling gaze of yours.

The moon offers a drop of melancholia
And the whole world is clothed in a shade of blue
Your shining blood is the only other color
And the scent of honey overwhelms me.

You give out the first whine of your existence
And the wall is shattered into a million pieces
I reach for you, to clothe your nudity
But you prefer the warm flow of your blood.

I hug you from the deepest part of me
I share in all you have, even your blood
If time stops now, I would not mind
I want us to stay like this forever.

But the stars conspire once more with the moon,
And the moon, with her consort, the sun
To cleanse the world of blood-stained creatures
You must vanish into nothing, my butterfly!

Ah, I am left all alone in this strange world
The silent dance that imitates the cycle of life
The broken gazes that uncover our emotions
Are thorns I dare not pluck out from my heart.

I slash my chest open without second thought
And took out my heart still pulsing with life
Blood goes out of my body but I care not
And a small white butterfly approaches…


Dec 18, '07 5:50 AM
for Miracle's network

From Multiply 001: Wingleaf

A tear escapes from the corner of my right eye…
The sunlight streams into the room
And the illusion of summer begins…

“What do you want to be?”
Your soft voice breaks the chains of time
And gently reaches my sleeping ears.

“What do you want to be?”
I open my eyes with silent stares on your hair
Flowing like golden silk threads.

You appear to me again, angelic apparition
Your body is clothed in the shining white
And your hair is adorned with wild flowers.

You have plucked out a strange leaf
From aeons ago when we first met
And place it on my reluctant hand.

“What do you want to do?”
You ask again with patience
And you look at me with sincere anxiety.

I look at you with confused eyes
I open my mouth to speak
But the winds of silence break my voice.

Instead of a reply to your question
I look at the leaf with wonder
The soft feather leaf of the purest white.

You humble yourself and I feel
Your soft velvet lips gently touch my right cheek
I float on the clouds of divine peace.

The air picks me up from where I stand
I cannot see your eyes nor your nose
But I see clearly those soft lips of sweet pink smile.

I awake from my dream
The second illusion of summer
Takes its toll from the wingleaf.

Dec 18, '07 5:48 AM
for Miracle's network

Advanced Farewell, Multiply

Last August 10, I heard the news that Multiply will be erasing all personal blogs when it decided the site shall be used as a marketplace instead of a blogsite.

So this month, my goal is to make sure that blogs I have written in Multiply will be transferred to either this bog site or to the safety of my hard disk.

For now, I won't be writing much, as I have realized that I have been indifferent to my studies.

Monday, September 10, 2012

Before 2012 Ends

Before 2012 ends, there are lots of things I have yet to do. Out of graduate school and I find myself leaning more towards movies and J-dramas, and spending less time with books. In just a few months I think I have become a screensucker and I find myself thanking the internet for classics I can read online.

When I finished my course in archaeology, I told myself that I would start leafing through the pages of my books as I have accumulated more than 300 books and am now having problems concerning space since I share a bedroom with my sisters and it disgusts them to see books everywhere from my so-called Garbage Island to my bed.

After years of focusing on too much non-fiction, I developed a short-lived thirst for fiction and so I planned to read all of Margaret Atwood and Robertson Davies' books in my collection, especially after reading the first's Lady Oracle and the second's The Papers of Samuel Marchbanks. Both authors are Canadians and I guess theirs would have to be my introduction to Canadian literature.

Other books I plan to read before 2012 ends are:

R. Davies' The Cunning Man, What's Bred in the Bone, The Lyre of Orpheus, The Deptford Trilogy, Leaven of Malice, A Mixture of Frailties

M. Atwood's Handmaid's Tale, Life before Men, The Robber Bride, The Edible Woman

Because this year 2012 is a special year in that the Phantom of the Opera will be staged in Manila, I also plan to read Gaston Leroux's novel of the same title from which the musical is based.

In addition, because  The Hobbit will be shown in theaters this December, I also told myself to read the Lord of the Rings Trilogy and if I were lucky enough to find a cheap copy of The Hobbit I would also gladly read it. All these before watching the movie.

The Philippine Philharmonic Orchestra (PPO) will have its opening concert on September 21 (Friday) at the Philamlife Auditorium. (Click here and here for more information) To show my support for our own wonderful musicians, I have made it a point to attend at least the opening concert. (And also because I just miss Philamlife Auditorium that much.)

If I still have money and time, then I would no doubt go see The Seagull (Ang Tagak) (Sept. 19-Oct. 7), a play by Anton Chekov, staged by Dulaang UP and directed by the great Tony Mabesa, with Filipino translation by Rolando Tinio.

On my birthday this December, I would love to cook for my family. This is to showcase my cooking skills (if indeed I gained any... LOL). Menu would be a mix of Italian and Mexican. There will be nachos and home-made salsa. I will also prepare a new pasta dish never been tasted by the world (yes, it will be a new invention by yours truly). If chance permits, I would buy salmon and grill it. For dessert I would just ask my sisters to buy a cake from Conti's. (Thinking about all these make me drool...)

And of course, I'd like to go out more with my close friends since it's been a long time since we did something meaningful together. Eating out would be the best option. Or perhaps we can go hang out at some karaoke bar and goof around as in the old days, this time by trying hard to be wonderful music artists, or in my case, being a rockstar wannabe.

Concerning travels, I would love to go to the Visayan region and visit the lovely beaches which I hear seem like paradise on earth.

Last but not the least, I would be very happy if I were to be able to take the JLPT this year. I shall only allow myself IF AND ONLY IF I can finish studying my materials. As of the present, I am stuck with Japanese for Today with six more lessons to go. At this rate, I doubt if I will be able to study my other materials. Maybe I'll just take the exam next year at the latest.

Less than 130 days to go...

Sunday, September 9, 2012

Reflections on the Overpass


On the overpass.

Endless lights against
The darkening sky with
Scattered pink and violet colors.

Cool breeze
Yet a warmth
Undefined
When thoughts of you invade my mind.

I look down
Thousands of light pairs
From cars plying the road down.
Crowded streets,
Too many people.

“In this world inhabited by billions of people,
What are the chances that I will see you again?”
Always in my thoughts.

I don’t even remember what you look like,
[Only you were a rosy-cheeked happy boy]
I even committed a grave sin
Of forgetting your name.
Was it Emmanuel? [Something like that]
I only remember those times when
We were seatmates in 2nd grade.
Then we became friends.
It’s all Johnny Bravo’s fault.
Or maybe Cow and Chicken’s.
Before you came, I only loved
Ninja Robots, Yaiba, and Dexter.
But you danced to me that silly dance,
Calling out, “Hey, momma!”
Silly, silly boy you were,
But you sure did create a special memory
Which until now I cherish and hold dear.
I wonder if you still are that
Cheerful, lively lad.
I wonder if you dance for a different lady now.
Either way I do hope you are happy
Wherever you are.
The thoughts of you make me smile
In times of loneliness.

And for that, I can only
Wait for the fates to make our paths cross again.

I don’t remember the first words you said,
Heck, I must admit I couldn’t hear
Your sweet little voice.
Everyday I wonder why you wouldn’t want
Your angelic voice be clearly heard.
Or maybe that’s why I find it all the more
Endearing, adorable
Because it is so difficult to get the words you say.
I remember the iced tea
The offer to treat me lunch
I remember talking about animé,
You loved Gundam Seed,
Yaoi, and you said
You play the piano.
I have always longed for the time
I would sit on your feet while you play
Chopin’s Etude in E Tristesse
[If it’s not too much to ask]
I remember those chicken sandwiches and thought
Life would be so wonderful if
I could wake up everyday with sandwiches you
Lovingly prepare.
I wish I could tell you how much
It hurts having this heart keep
Memories of you:
Your plump [sexy for me] figure
Your quirky, childlike ways
Your words of encouragement…

And for that, I can only
Wait for the fates to make our paths cross again.

I remember our first encounter.
I was awed, impressed
Okay, a bit intimidated.
I conjured images of you in my mind.
[Only the fact that you have curly hair is correct]
I remember one time
You changed your avatar into Tuxedo Mask
Sailormoon’s lover.
Maybe I was assuming a lot
It made me giddy
Because I have always proclaimed,
“Dea lvnae svm!”
And so, I deeply wish you
And I would meet one day
In China, in Canada, doesn’t matter.
Just let me see you in person
Even for just one second.
Then I think I’d know bliss
from the workings of fate.

And for that, I can only
Wait for the fates to make our paths cross.

Sunday, September 2, 2012

September and An Advanced Wishlist

September--- my second favorite month next to December mainly because it's in this month when we celebrate the Mid-Autumn Festival (also known as Harvest Moon Festival or Mooncake Festival). Part of the celebration is of course attending parties where we play the dice game and win prizes. In one annual party, we get to win money instead of goodies. In another, there's a raffle draw with money as prize, too. In both parties, I have always been a recipient of scholarship awards, ever since I started going to school until this year when I finished my post-graduate diploma course. It's no wonder that I have always anticipated the month of September because for certain I would be getting money.

And of course, the advent of September means that December is nearing. So here is my wishlist, prepared in advance. While I do not really expect much since I rarely get anything for my birthday or Christmas, I still love listing down the things I want as presents.

1. Roundtrip tickets to any Asian country, preferably China and Japan.

2. a smartphone

3. an ipad

4. tickets to theater performances

5. restaurant gift certificates (I like Mexican, Italian, Japanese, Chinese, and Persian cuisine.)

6. Doc Martens boots (without the heels, please)

7. a gamer's laptop (Asus brand)

I guess that's all for now. Will update in the weeks ahead. :)